A glossary of Bahai terms – by anon.

The following glossary of Baha’i terms was inspired by Juan Cole’s ironic “The Ghoul’s Glossary: the 2008 Election”, which is the first entry for 4 November on his Informed Comment blog. Just as the recent US election inspired new ways of using language, which threw up the need for a glossary to explain the new meanings, I thought I’d write a glossary for those trying to understand the latest meanings of terms found in common Baha’i parlance.

Anna’s presentation – 1) an illustrated document summarising the latest version of the Baha’i revelation used to convert seekers; a script usually memorised and spoken verbatim during presentations.

Baha’u’llah – the latest manifestation of God, whose revelation is updated on a regular basis by the Universal House of Justice; a 19th-century eccentric Iranian gentleman who spoke a strange language and received few visitors.

believer – a human resource.

disenrolment – an administrative procedure involving the issuing of a form letter for removing from the community a believer who promulgates persuasive opinions that do not keep abreast of the latest updates to the Baha’i revelation by the Universal House of Justice; not a punishment.

dogmatic materialists – scholars of Baha’i studies who use reason and evidence in their discussion and conclusions.

infallible – the condition of never having to make the following concession speech: “We fought — we fought as hard as we could. And though we fell short, the failure is mine, not yours”.

Ruhi – .

scholar – a learned person; esp. Baha’i scholar – a believer who has yet to detach from individualistic intellectual pursuits and fully commit to the community endeavour of advancing the process of entry by troops.

systematization – a pyramid scheme.

teaching – evangelising; the process of converting non-believers to the latest version of the Baha’i revelation and acceptance of future updates from the House of Justice.

theologian – a person who studies religion; part. Baha’i theologian – a person who has received, or will recive, the disenrolment form letter.

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