Return with Clear Eyes

It has been a couple of months since I have legitimately blogged here. Aside from a project of the same name on a more “private” blog (web.me.com/samjosrob) , my personal mission with this blog is more familiar coming back than it was when I left. My intent is to transcribe my own spiritual journey for my own personal use and for others to see. A couple of months ago, I decided to stop for an indefinite amount of time. I deleted my earlier blog entries foolishly, but it has given me the sense of the ability to start fresh. That is what I want to do.

Being a Baha’i on one’s lonesome can be difficult, but it can also be a blessing in many senses. I was a Baha’i on his lonesome for a year (with some on and off periods), and I believe I may have hit the longest, most permanent off period. Irreconcilable differences included the view of homosexuality, the limited room for questioning of scripture, the “Haifan Order’s” stifling papalesque existence, any other issues were on my mind. The religion I believed was an expression of the nature of God I began to doubt as a mid 19th century movement and Baha’u’llah as a simple religious thinker rather than a prophet of God. At this point, my doubts outweighed my certainty, and I took an extended hiatus. I haven’t thought about much of it in a while. I haven’t read the Aqdas, or looked into the Hidden Words for insight, or reviewed the Iqan for “certitude”. I haven’t been going on a spiritual journey, or so I thought. I suppose the journey is never over, and it parallels my life. Inaction is just as important as action in the sense it has cleared my mind.

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