Fitting in...

Well ok, lets see- I had these thoughts moving around in my head and decided to write them down to see if anyone else every felt the same way.

I live in a city of 2 million people and sometimes it seems like those 2 million are all trying to get away from the other 2 million (me included). Why do I live around so many people and yet half the time feel like I don’t know that many people and like I can’t ever seem to connect with any of them.

I have been reflecting on feelings of exclusion and fitting in. And why i don’t feel like I fit in- what ever that means. Like I am too young, too poor, too right brained, too unsophisticated, too thrift store shoppingish (if that makes sense) to be able to hang out with the crowd of people who are older, career oriented, have money and nice clothes, nice strollers, are super sophisticated …

I guess I have never fully delt with those issues from when I was a kid in elementary school. Our family was always a little different. Growing up a baha’i we moved to a small town in Alberta, Canada from San Diego, California so that my dad could work on the Native reserve close by. The schools I went to were french catholic conservative as were most of the other people living in the town. We were dressed in second hand clothes and ate health food while the other kids laughed at my clothes and ate fruit loops and white bread for lunch.

{josquote}My parents really were amazing examples of inclusion and acceptance.{/josquote}

I guess I lamented over my situation as a kid, but looking back I am so grateful for those opportunities, being exposed to both the white conservative world and also the rich native culture. My parents really were amazing examples of inclusion and acceptance. They didn’t see ethnicities of people, or socio economic differences, or language barriers, they excepted everyone and really included them in our lives. When I was 9 years old we moved to Vancouver Island, BC so my parents could work at a baha’i int’l boarding school. The school was chalk full of people from all over the world trying to live together in a unified way and trying to practice the principles of the baha’i faith. I always remember my mom going out of her way to become friends with the volunteers who would had come from different countries, most of them did not speak alot of english or have alot of money. My parents always really encouraged us to become friends with and include those who had been excluded from the ‘intimate circle of friends’. I remember really thinking about that and trying (not all the time but…) to include those people who were kind of on the outskirts of the ‘in crowd’.

Full story...