Humour

Items ranging from the gently ironic to the satirical

The True, SECRET WEAPON of the Baha'is - BEWARE!!

Fearless Leader: I recently discovered the true, secret weapon of the Baha’is. Everytime I visit the local Baha’is in my city I am amazed at the cleverness of the Baha’i s . . .

How well they train their grandmommies! Unbelievable!!

The tea these ladies serve is highly aromatic . . .(they must put something in it that disarms critical thinking). Then they (suspiciously) bring out platters after platter of bogoli polo, MORE THAN IS POSSIBLE TO EAT IN ONE DAY, causing unsuspecting guests to think they will insult these ladies if they refuse a third and fourth helping!!

{josquote}I think (burp!) it’s a plot!!{/josquote}

BEWARE!! All that “FRIENDSHIP” and “FEASTING” (both well-known Baha’i occupations) has a numbing effect!! After the meal, the same ladies bring out impossibly small homemade cookies (also suspiciously aromatic) and smile at their guests, bowing and serving!

It is of some concern that the Baha’i community in this locale appears to be dominated by highly-motivated aging ladies. Sir, they have had a lifetime of training, yet everyone thinks they are harmless!

Nonsense! They sing off-key and are a threat to the waistline of all true believers!! They don’t take “NO” for an answer. The Baha’i grandmommies look small and cute, but they are tough as nails!! If you go to their houses, you will have to promise to return again and again before they will let you leave!! CLEVER!!

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If drug companies started a religion...

{josquote}I need a belief system that serves my needs right away.{/josquote}

Dean Sachs has a mortgage, a family, and an extremely demanding job, What he doesn't need is a religion that complicates his ilfe with unreasonable ethical demands.


Spiritual providers in the past have required a huge amount of commitment — single-deity clauses, compulsory goodness, and a litany of mystifying mumbo-jumbo. It's no wonder people are switching to Mammon.

Mammon isn’t the biggest player in the spiritual race - But our ability to deliver on our promise is unique. And our moral flexibility unmatchable.

MAMMON.

Because you deserve to enjoy life - guilt free.

image from "Adbusters"

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Expansion by expulsion

The Expulsion from the Garden of Eden (Masaccio)

The Universal House of Justice is trying every which way to make Baha'is more active. It's tried working through national and local assemblies and it's tried through the ITC, Counsellors, ABMs and clusters, using the Ruhi institute process. More recently, it's trying out a bunch of regional conferences. All those methods have been quite labour-intensive and sometimes quite capital-intensive. Travel, study, venues, accommodation and materials all add to the cost.

The House is nothing if not systematic. It tries something, evaluates and adapts it, then tries again. If anything seems to work, it gets adopted and tried elsewhere. "Anna's presentation" is probably a good example. A script in a training manual becomes an integral part of door-to-door teaching.

{josquote}I'm speaking of removal of membership.{/josquote}

But there's one thing the House has tried that seems to have had stunning results in activating Baha'is, yet doesn't appear to have been adapted and adopted.

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